The Lord Builds the House.

On my mind...

These are just some verses on children that I have looked up-they were actually in the stack of cards that I took with me into labor and delivery with Logan-I have had these thoughts on my mind the past few days and thought I would journal about it.

Psalm 127: 1-5

 Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep. Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

John 16:21

When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.

Psalm 139:13-16

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.

Ecclesiastes 11:5

As you do not know the way the spirit comes to the bones in the womb of a woman with child, so you do not know the work of God who makes everything.

Today I am frustrated as I remember times when we were criticized for having our children; criticized by people who are in the Church. It was very hurtful to us when we were at a time when we were very excited about the new life and potential to be criticized about something that was our decision. With Roman, it was that we were "too early" into our marriage relationship to become pregnant according to their standards. (We had been married six months when we found out we were pregnant.) Although Roman was not planned by us, he was planned by God and is not a mistake. With Logan, it was "too soon" after having our first child to be pregnant again. "What were we thinking?" We did plan on having Logan. We wanted our children to be close in age so they can have a close bond and friendship as they grow together. Also, last time I checked, it wasn't that unusual to have children a year and a half apart? I believe children are a blessing and should be celebrated for their new life, regardless of the situation into which they are born. Why criticize about a pregnancy when there is all ready a person growing? It saddens me that people that profess to be Christians could think bringing a child into a loving marriage should be looked down upon. This upset us greatly.I would not change one minute of having my boys for one without them being here. They are wonderful. Yes, there are stressful times, but it is worth having them!

 

What is wrong with the Church? Where are the genuine believers? I know there are genuine people in the Church, however, it seems like more and more it is being taken over by hypocrites; people who only care what people think of them and how they appear. They show up to church every Sunday with a smile on their face and wearing their nice clothes while their lives away from church are not matching up. Prayer requests become gossips and people that are truly hurting inside, don't get help because they are afraid of what people will think of them if they share what is really going on in their life. The sad thing is that the people who have treated me the worst in my life have been professing Christians. In these situations I trusted these people and they were hateful and deceitful and the bridges that were part of those relationships were burned. What is going on here? I'm tired of lukewarm living-around me and also in my life.

 

I'm not saying that we are the perfect Christians or anything close. In fact, we have been struggling with wanting to go to church for these reasons. We want something genuine; something real. We haven't found a church that feels genuine yet; that is not putting on a show. It is also hard to go visit new churches not knowing who will be working in the nursery or how safe the nursery procedures are for our kids. We have just been doing our own thing at home lately. We are going to a church with some friends this weekend and I am excited about it. Also just excited to spend some time with some new friends!